15 phrases that in no case should be said to a person in hysterics: it will only get worse

6. “It’s okay”

For whom? For you, maybe yes, but for another person, the situation can be really tragic and really scary. In this state of affairs, your words will work exactly the opposite, and may increase the negative state.

7. “Everything will be fine!”

You cannot know what will happen in the future. In some situations, “good” is not possible (death, divorce, loss of valuable property, severe injury…) and the person will have to learn to live with this new state.

8. “Could be worse”

This phrase, as it were, devalues ​​the experiences and feelings of the victim. That is, he emphasizes that his misfortune is worthless, but for someone … But no matter how small the reason for experiencing from our point of view, the experiencer experiences real strong emotions and for him this situation will indeed be grief.

9. “So it was necessary”

Who needs it, why, why? A person does not understand why this happened to him, what he was guilty of and to whom. Most likely, he just won’t believe you, and if he does, his self-esteem may suffer – “that’s what I need,” “I’m a loser,” “I don’t deserve good things,” and so on.

10. “I told you (told you) that it would be so!”

Yes, you probably spoke, warned and explained, but now this does not make it any easier for a person. The situation has already happened, and talking about “what if” is completely inappropriate. A “debriefing” can be arranged when a person calms down.

11. “Calm down!”

Oddly enough, this is a phrase to nowhere. Especially if the state of grief is in an acute stage and not all tears have been shed. And most importantly, the problem has not been solved yet.

12. “Time heals”

Over time, after experiencing several stages of the state of grief, as a rule, our pain subsides. But rarely, when it passes completely without a trace. Just from a state of acute grief, we will eventually begin to experience calm sadness, and we will find new resources to live on. But today, when the soul hurts so much, it is not worth appealing to some distant mystical “time”. Again, no one really knows what will happen next in this particular situation.

13. “I had this, and nothing”

Different people have many mental processes in different ways. Reactions to events also vary, and an event that is completely calmly tolerated by one person can knock out another for a long time. By analogy with the pain threshold – everyone has his own.

14. “How are you tired of me (tired)”

We are all living people and may well experience negative emotions, we may get tired of other people’s tantrums or just be tired at this moment. And in this situation, it is better to just leave and not add additional experiences to a stressed person. Take care of yourself – until you yourself are not in order, you will not be able to help another.

15. “Men don’t cry!”

“You must be strong!”, “You are a boy (guy, man)”, and so on. Men experience the same emotions and are just as entitled to tears in times of grief. The developed stereotype teaches to restrain emotions within oneself, which in the future can lead to diseases of the cardiovascular system, stomach ulcers, hypertension and others.

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